Wake-Up Call: "Hold Me Closer Tony Danza" Edition

At Farley's Pub in Scranton last night, where people gathered to watch the debate, "rumors that actor Tony Danza would make an appearance proved unfounded" (Scranton Times-Tribune). Sad.

At yesterday's WH welcoming ceremony for the pope, ex-Sen. Rick Santorum (R-PA) was "way in the back" where the staffers stood, but "he sure was excited" ("In the Loop"). [ed. note. NOT sad]

"I'd rather get fat, grow a beard, and try for the Nobel Prize" -- Mitt Romney, giving his top ten reasons for dropping out of the race at last night's Radio & TV correspondents' Assn dinner (Wake-Up Call! sources).

and finally... the reason why tonight's Colbert Report is a not-to-miss edition:

HRC and Rep. Patrick Murphy (D-PA) on "The Colbert Report" (Comedy Central, 11:30 pm).

My two fave politicians in one place... though it's odd they paired them together, as Murph-dog is an Obama supporter.

Last Call: political olympics edition

• Perhaps it's her fear of getting the silver medal that's fueling HRC's new Olympic doubts.

• Obama ignited speculation that he hasn't really quit smoking today after he offered a light to the snuffed Olympic torch.

I'm F*cking Annoyed I Enjoyed This So Much

Inspired by Sarah Silverman, natch.

Yes! She! Can!

Last night provided a happy end to what was a no-good, very-bad day. Hillary won (as she needed to) Rhode Island, Ohio, AND Texas! It felt sooooo good, especially because I had forgotten how it felt to have my candidate win. To honor these wins, I wanted to find the Dixie Chicks song that plays at all her events which, no joke, gives me shivers and brings my emotional-self to tears with the thought of her as president! She's ready to run...

In her email to supporters last night, Hillary said:

It's a pretty incredible feeling, isn't it? After our victories tonight we have the momentum, thanks to your will, determination, and hard work.

Some people were ready to count us out. But you and I proved them wrong, just as we have every time they tried to declare this race over prematurely. And we're going to keep showing them exactly what we can do.

We're going to do it for everyone across America who's been counted out -- but refused to be knocked out. For everyone who's stumbled -- but stood right back up. And for everyone who works hard -- but never gives up. [Emphasis mine]

I hope you enjoy our victories tonight as much as I am [Ed. Note - I DID!]. We won this one together, and that makes it that much better. Thank you so very much for all you have done for our campaign. Let's build on this remarkable momentum.

Thank you for everything you did to make this night possible.
All the best, Hillary

I'll admit it - I'm a sucker for the bit about "everyone across America who's been counted out... but refused to be knocked out." It makes me misty-eyed and hopeful. So with that, Hillary earned another shiny 20 dollar bill from moi. That should put her over the top, I'm sure.

The Penis-Litmus Test

Yes! Ann! Yes!

I'm totally hijacking here, but it conveys my sentiments EXACTLY.

I hear that male Democratic voters are divided over whether to support Hillary Clinton or Barack Obama. I suppose this is what we can expect from next week's Washington Post Outlook section?

(For your reference, this is what the Outlook section looked like this week. Further context here, here, and here.)
Posted by Ann at 04:06 PM

For what it's worth, "penis-litmus test" is almost as fun to say as JM's "vagina-litmus test." Snazzy.

Nervous Nelly

My dad, one of the two people I know who actually listen to Rush Limbaugh's radio show (the other won has to, for work purposes), told me last night that he was emphatically urging his listeners in Texas to vote for Hillary, since it's an open primary.

I know it's bad, but I was secretly grateful for Rushie's orders - however ill-intentioned they may be. People (read far-right conservatives) actually listen to this man.

Today is just nerve-wracking for a myriad of reasons... stay tuned.

It's important to note that my dad, while a Republican, is a moderate, and only listens to Rush because he makes my dad laugh... whereas Rush makes me hateful and anxious. Whatever... to each his own.

Last Call: Double-Dipping

Courting both OH and TX is like trying to date two people at once. Eventually you're going to call one by the wrong pet issue and ruin everything.

"There's nothing on this Earth sexier, believe me...

... than a woman you have to salute in the morning."

Indeed, Mr. Nicholson. Indeed.

I'd like to take this opportunity to remind you why some people think Hillary is best for our country.

And now, time to do my taxes.

Ellen Plays Hardball with Hillary Clinton...

... Molly plays hardball with her cackling laugh. Seriously, my laugh in the video below is enough to make me never want to laugh again. EVER.

Anyway, last night I went to see Hillary Live! - a HRC fundraiser at GWU - and it was obviously tons of fun. But I'm a Hillary supporter, so was I really not going to like it? I don't think so. A definite highlight was Ellen DeGeneres' surprise live appearance via satellite. That's the YouTube video above. And it's getting mad hits, thanks to Perez Hilton and Towelroad!

So yeah, what are other bloggers saying about it? Well, it's not all sunbeams and chocolate sauce (I had to go there), but it's still fun to read:

From Perez Hilton himself (it's totes my pic and my YouTube video... loves it): Oprah Winfrey has lent her support to Barack Obama. And, now…. Ellen DeGeneres is tossing her hat into the political ring as well! The funnywoman joined Hillary Clinton via satellite on a campaign stop Monday night. Click here to check out Ellen's appearance. SO funny!

From Wake-Up Call: Ellen DeGeneres made an unannounced satellite appearance at HRC's GW fundraiser last night, where the two discussed the merits of a presidential ban on glitter ("The Swamp").

Also from Wake-Up Call: Meanwhile, a smattering of GW frat boys stood outside HRC's fundraiser last night, with one holding an Obama sign, and another holding a homemade "Bros before Hos" poster (Wake-Up Call! reporting).

And from Ellen's website: Ellen was full of surprises Tuesday. Here she interrupts one of Senator Hillary Clinton's campaign stops to ask Hillary about the big issue that has divided America for too long, "glitter or no glitter?"

From Politico's Ben Smith: My colleague Beth Frerking reports that Hillary took questions from Ellen DeGeneres, via teleconference, at a rally tonight at George Washington University.Said Ellen, after rowdy applause from the student audience: "I have some tough questions for you if you don’t mind.”

From Towelroad: Ellen DeGeneres appeared on screen at a Hillary Clinton fundraising rally at George Washington University in D.C. last night. DeGeneres jokingly asked Clinton whether or not she would promise a ban on glitter. Clinton said she would ban it for those over the age of 12. Said Ellen: "That's what I like about you. You have solutions."

UPDATE:

From Huffington Post: I liked what I saw of Hillary tonight, she was poised and smooth, a real pro, as expected. But she really needs to display all her courage, brains and heart for the Ohio debate. The hourglass is running out fast.

UPDATE 2: The NEW MOViN 92.5 embedded my YouTube video. This is so much fun for me, so I'm sorry for boring you all, but it's the first time I've gotten readers that aren't my friends which I force to read my blog!

My Dad is Funny

A conversation with my Dad on day 3 of the flu. My dad, the consummate republican, offered this sage advice.

Dad: How are you feeling today?

MJ: Not good, Dad. Not good at all.

Dad: Better than yesterday?

MJ: I so desperately want to feel better than I did yesterday. I really, really want to. But it's just not happening.

Dad: Have you thought of texting "HOPE" to 62262? Then you can be the change you believe in.

MJ: Daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad...

Wake-Up Call: Like a Sunbeam Dipped in Chocolate

My co-worker AK has a way with words, and she once described a really friendly and really good person as "a sunbeam dipped in chocolate," and ever since then, I can't stop using the phrase every chance I get. It'd make a fabulous letterpress card, wouldn't it? Sigh. For my next life.

Anyway, this morning's Wake-Up Call provided me with, yet another, excuse to use this phrase:

A "Hillary Clinton Pantsuit Schedule" is on display in the back of her plane. The schedule indicates that Clinton wears "sunshine yellow" on Sundays ("Political Radar").

Bitches Get Stuff Done

Courtesy of the fabulous Tracy, and also my flu-inspired fever which allowed me to watch TV for the first time in a week, I must bring you this delicious clip:

Tina Fey makes me proud to be a woman, Hillary makes me proud to vote democrat, and these warm-and-fuzzies are taking me out of my flu and into the real world again so I can Get. Stuff. Done.

I had to switch out the youtube videos because they look the last one down. Sorry!

Who Is Your Presidential Hottie Soulmate?

I know, I know, but give me a break. I've been battling the flu on all four cylinders since Sunday, so if this provided me a mild reprieve, then you shouldn’t mock me for it.

So who is YOUR Presidential Hottie Soulmate? Mine is Abe Lincoln. Aww yeah.

a common-ground comic for commonsense people

I meant to post this on Valentine's Day, but two glasses of wine in, I totes forgot.

I like it because it works for those of my friends who support Obama AND those that support Hillary. I like to call it: a common-ground comic for commonsense people.

"When the Magic Fades"

When the magic fades, indeed. David Brooks hit the nail on the head in his NYT column today, entitled "When the Magic Fades." I don't agree with all of this cheeky column, namely the "Sitting Shiva for America Tour," but I certainly understand the comparison.

As the syndrome progresses, they begin to ask questions about The Presence himself:

Barack Obama vowed to abide by the public finance campaign-spending rules in the general election if his opponent did. But now he’s waffling on his promise. Why does he need to check with his campaign staff members when deciding whether to keep his word?

Obama says he is practicing a new kind of politics, but why has his PAC sloshed $698,000 to the campaigns of the superdelegates, according to the Center for Responsive Politics? Is giving Robert Byrd’s campaign $10,000 the kind of change we can believe in?

If he values independent thinking, why is his the most predictable liberal vote in the Senate? A People for the American Way computer program would cast the same votes for cheaper.

I've said it before, and I'll take this opportunity to say it again: I think all of this back and forth is good for the democratic party, though it is becoming detrimental to friendships.

I have to say that personally, as the race for the democratic nomination goes on and on and on, I'm finding it harder to actually like the man who once brought me to tears of joy at the '04 Democratic National Convention. If he wins, and he likely will, I'm going to vote for him - but will I be able to campaign for him like I do for Hillary? I can only HOPE... which is an ironic choice of words.

Wake-Up Call: Sweetheart Edition

Valentine's Day is for suckers.

According to staffers, Chris Matthews "apologizes -- sometimes with a hug and a declaration of love -- after inappropriate remarks," and he also "offers unsolicited romantic advice" (Washington Post).

"Because she's got more balls than anyone else I know. Wait, can I say that?" -- a San Antonio woman, asked why she’s supporting HRC ("Political Radar").

"I thought Cher was pretty hot" -- Obama, when asked "Sonny & Cher or Donny & Marie" (People).

"I'm sure you are going to heaven" -- Del. Eleanor Holmes Norton (D-isenfranchised), closing her remarks to Roger Clemens (Roll Call).

The NYC condom has a new look and a new ad campaign urging New Yorkers to
"get some" (New York Sun).

The "'Bitch set me up' -- The Marion Barry Appreciation Society" Facebook group "boasts nearly 900 members" ("Yeas & Nays").

Last Call: tossing you a soft ball

Just to keep himself humble, the next time they play basketball, Obama is totally letting HRC win.

You know all those older voters who didn't turn out for HRC yesterday? They were busy saving the good spots right behind McCain for his victory speech.

"Today I want to take it down a notch" -- Obama, giving up "hope" for a hot second to talk about the economy ("Political Radar").

Everything's Groovy (it's a Grand Day)...

...NOT.

My brian is mush, so I can only link to the myriad things that entertained me today. You know, in the wake of the Potomac Primaries. My one saving grace is the delish salad I got from my new best friend, aka Chop't, today.

And if you think I'm making a bigger deal out of the Potomac Primaries that I should be, especially considering the fact that everyone and their great-Aunt-Sally knew that Obama and McCain would sweep 'em, let me ask you how familiar YOU are with not having your vote count, um, EVER, and then we'll talk... mmmkay?

From the Gridskipper: "I give him an 80 percent chance of becoming president," says a 75-year-old resident of Obama, Japan. The town in Fukui prefecture is totally stoked for change, Barack style: "We know we can't vote. But if we send out a message, we can help push him to victory." [AFP]

Via Shenanigans:
Those donuts Obama delivered really paid off! (What is Obama calling Republicans who vote for him? Obamacans.)

Courtesy of Metrocurean: A slice of Barack pie.

And finally, the DCist calls it like they see it: The District is Obama Country.

Red-Eyed Report: Coming Down from the Potomac Primaries

Oy. What a long day. What a long, long day.

First, HRC lost in all three primaries. Not at all a shock, but still hard for a Hillary supporter to digest after volunteering so much. Still, it's not over 'til it's over.

Oh, and it's worth mentioning that besides the departure of CM and DCM, two more people have left her campaign in the big shake-up, including the fabulous Crystal Patterson. I have mad love for Crystal.

Second, I fell not once, not twice, but three times on my walk home in the ice storm.

Third, when I arrived home, I learned my elevators were busted... again. So I had to walk up nine flights of stairs. Admittedly, this wouldn't be SO bad, but I was buzzed, tired, and bruised from my walk home so it became that much more difficult.

Fourth, I failed to go to the post office yesterday, which means all my valentines will be late. Sad molly j.

Hopefully today will be better. Reading this, from Hotline's Wake-Up Call, was a good start:

Vogue's Andre Leon Talley "may miss the Paris women's wear shows" this year because he's volunteering for the Obama camp (New York Post).

Potomac Primary: Update #4

Can you tell I'm drunk (fig·ur·a·tive·ly, not literally... yet) from the excitement of a primary the nation actually cares about?

From Hotline's Last Call:

McCain "crossed the aisle in the Senate this morning to shake hands" and share a "modified man hug" with Obama ("The Trail")... HRC, meanwhile, "missed the vote" to block retroactive telecom immunity ("Spin Cycle").

Officials are projecting strong turnout in DC, MD and VA (AP), and primary voting seems to be "going smoothly" ("Political Ticker").

Obama and DC Mayor Adrian Fenty delivered "hot chocolate" and "two boxes of mixed donuts" to campaign volunteers today ("Political Intelligence"). Meanwhile, on its way to the airport today, the Huckabee press van ran out of gas ... twice ("First Read").

"Despite being a woman, Sen. Clinton is the only candidate that has been spotted wearing a mustache" -- the American Mustache Institute, explaining its endorsement but, sadly, not providing pics ("The Swamp").

And, you know, just because they're funny like that:

We'll vote today and have our voices heard, because, ultimately, we know there are people in the world who will never have that opportunity.

Right now, Marion Barry is directing traffic outside a crowded polling station. Tomorrow, he'll be cited for a traffic violation and everything will go back to normal.

We hear Pres. Bush has recorded a phone message in support of his candidate, but nobody has taken his call yet to confirm.

"There is a greater chance that I would dye my hair green and get tattoos all over my body and do a rock tour with Amy Winehouse" -- Huckabee, on making a Senate bid (Hotline reporting, 2/12).