April 15, 2008

The Dictionary of Corporate Bullshit

Check these out:

watercooler games: Informal conversations among staff members on subjects including gossip, reality TV, weddings, and the status of people's efforts to find another job; favorite pastime of the office flirt and and employees afflicted with boredom, the latter of whom will be scolded by their boss for spending too much time socializing, even though they've only been given busywork assignments for the past three months.

weird person: The really strange employee who always stops by your office to chat, wants to do lunch, and seems to want something from you, but you can't really figure out what that is; never really has much to say, just kind of hangs out; may have a bizarre speech pattern and slightly crazed look in the eyes.

stapler: An office supply that you will give little thought to until you don't have one or can't find yours, at which point you will go insane and realize its place as a true modern miracle on par with the automobile; frequent object of coworker theft (you might want to label yours); achieved well-deserved mythic status in the movie Office Space.

Do they remind you of anyone/anyplace/anything? I bolded and reddened (is that a word?) the parts that speak directly to my soul, and I'm sure many of you have your own examples of how they relate to your life.

I guess corporate life isn't as different from non-profit life as I'd like to believe. It's basically non-profit life with actual money to enjoy living it.

1 comment:

Rachel said...

I know this all too well